Tuesday, October 28, 2014

Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time - Brigid Schulte

Title: Overwhelmed: Work, Love, and Play When No One Has the Time
Author: Brigid Schulte
Publisher: Harper Collins, 2014 (Hardcover)
Length: 338 pages
Genre: Adult; Nonfiction
Started: October 18, 2014
Finished: October 28, 2014

Summary:
From the inside cover:

Overwhelmed is a book about time pressure and modern life. And it comes at the perfect moment: Amid debates about the toll of conflicting demands on parents and our addiction to the daily grind, Overwhelmed is just what we need to address our questions about work, love, and play. Brigid Schulte, an award-winning journalist for The Washington Post and a harried mother of two, began her journey to rediscover leisure when she realized her life was becoming "like the the dream I keep having about trying to run a race wearing ski boots." She goes from the depths of the "time confetti" of her days to an understanding of what the ancient Greeks knew was the point of living a good life: having time to refresh the soul in leisure. What Schulte finds is illuminating, perplexing, and maddening, but ultimately hopeful.

Taking the baton from such pathbreakers as Barbara Ehrenreich, Arlie Hochchild's The Second Shift, and Juliet Schor's The Overwhelmed American, Schulte details not only the intensifying pressures on women, and increasingly on men, but also how feeling overwhelmed is affecting our health and even the size of our brains. At times, the author becomes her own subject, as when she sits, jet-lagged and hungry, in a Paris auditorium crammed with scholars and dozes off - until a speaker lamenting the toll of "role overload" on working parents snaps her awake.

She visits Sarah Blaffer Hrdy, the renowned anthropologist, who presents hard evidence that women are not "wired" for child care - so a "natural" family arrangement might actually include heavy involvement on the father's part. It's a model that's taken root not only among the hunter-gatherer tribes in the Kalahari Desert the Hrdy has studied, but also in Denmark, the world's happiest country, where it's possible to work short, productive, flexible hours and still be successful, committed workers and attentive parents - and have time for oneself.

Overwhelmed is both a map of the stresses that have ripped our leisure to shreds and a blueprint for how to put the pieces back together. What Schulte offers us is a revelatory, at times hilarious, and at heart optimistic view of how we can begin to find time for the things that matter most and live more fulfilled lives.

Review:
When I first saw this available at my library, I scooped it up as soon as I realized what it was about. Like most mothers, I struggle to balance full-time work, my family, and running a household. Growing up, I saw what overwhelmed looked like (my mother was the poster child for it), and resolved to not fall into the same traps when I had children. Though I do make time for myself through reading, other forms of leisure and especially play are hard for me to accomplish, especially with a husband who works many hours. I know most of my female friends that are married with children feel the same, and I figured there must be some reason why the majority of mothers feel this way, and it turns out there is.

The author divides her book into two main parts: describing how leisure time has eroded in the past 50-60 years and why people feel so overwhelmed by "role  overload", and the second with how to possibly address this problem in three areas: work, love, and play. The second section examines flex time policies, family leave, and groups that encourage women to play in different areas all over the world.

This was an eye-opening book that all women, particularly mothers, should read. In fact, their husbands should read it too since men are feeling the pressure nowadays as well. Traditionally, men fell victim to the "perfect worker" stereotype of the person locked at the desk for hours on end, first to get there and the last to leave. When women started working, since most ended up with jobs that didn't make enough to make the cost of child care worth it, many ended up either staying home or taking jobs that specifically allowed them to work around their children's care schedule. With men focusing more on working hard, long hours so as not to go against North American society's view of the perfect worker, women were left to balance not only their own work, but the household responsibilities and that of their children as well. With it not being as socially acceptable for men to take family leave after the birth of their children, they become less comfortable with caring for them, leaving those duties to their wives. Since society has protected men's leisure time through sports and social outings but in a strange way has stigmatized women who are not accomplishing something at all hours, women feel increasingly guilty wen taking time for themselves if they aren't crossing off something on the never-ending to-do list.

The chapters on Denmark were enlightening. Men are obligated to take family leave just like women, offices automatically close by 4:30-5pm, and all stores close close to 7pm. Plus, working harder rather than smarter is frowned upon, if you stay at an office in Denmark till past 5pm, you'll be the only one there. It's obviously a two-fold problem: our policies do not encourage a proper work-life balance, and our culture encourages the perfect worker stereotype because we assume that working longer means working better, when in fact studies show people work better in shorter spans with frequent breaks.

Recommendation:
All people, especially parents, should read this book. Hopefully this will encourage readers to advocate for flexible policies at your workplaces in order for everyone to benefit.

Thoughts on the cover:
It looks like my to-do list, I like it.

Thursday, October 9, 2014

On the Way to Everywhere - Kirsten B. Feldman

Title: On the Way to Everywhere
Author: Kirsten B. Feldman
Publisher: Independently published (Paperback), 2014 (Review copy is an ARC from the author)
Length: 178 pages
Genre: Young Adult; Realistic Fiction
Started: October 7, 2014
Finished: October 9, 2014

Summary: 
From the back cover:

Though she's named for the magical Harry Potter, six-foot, dreadlocked Harry Kavanaugh doesn't find any wonder in her daily life at an exclusive girls' school outside of Washington D.C. In fact she wants nothing more than to chuck her lot and enter the wilds of public school - too bad she didn't reckon on a trip to the hospital, a runaway, and a renegade or three, which just might show her a different path to everywhere.

Review:
I'm so happy I got the chance to review this book, I would've missed a wonderful coming-of-age story otherwise.

To say that Harry doesn't fit in would be an understatement. She's an intelligent, tall redhead who doesn't fit your stereotypical image of femininity, so she stands out amongst the other girls at her private school. She's the product of her parents' one last hurrah after their divorce, so her father, stepmother, and half-sister Felicity don't exactly treat her well. Her mother, Imogene Gayle, is Harry's opposite, self-absorbed and flighty, who also teaches dance at the school. Harry just wants to find somewhere she can be accepted, so she hatches a plan to flunk out of Boltmore so her mother will allow her to attend public school with her friend William. However, due to the support of her older brother Jeremy, the influence of her English teacher, a budding romance with William, and finding a mandatory sport for PE that she actually enjoys; Harry begins to rethink her grand plan.

Harry is a wonderful character. She's spunky with a dark sense of humour, and stays true to herself rather than put on a mask to fit in; something a lot of teenagers could learn from. She's equally admirable and vulnerable, desperately wanting acknowledgement from her mother and father instead of their indifference. This makes her realistic and likeable, I was rooting for her from the beginning.

I also felt that the other characters had equal opportunity for growth. Harry's parents, though deplorable in the beginning, were actually worthy of sympathy by the end. Jeremy is just wonderful, I wanted to rip him out of the book so he could be my brother. Even Harry's school counsellor Vishnu had his moment.

I enjoyed the depiction of Harry's various relationships. Jeremy is an incredible big brother and advocates for his little sister, something sibling relationships in novels don't portray too often. In turn, Harry is supportive of Jeremy's relationship with his new boyfriend (kudos to the author for the LGBT reference). Harry's slowly developing romance with William was heart-warming to observe, not to mention avoiding all the cliches YA novels tend to fall into (yay for no insta-love!). Harry even manages to find common ground with her mother, which was pleasantly surprising.

I have to give the author credit on her writing style. Harry's narration draws readers in to her fast-paced, sarcastic wit; while the successful world-building puts you right in the upper class environment Harry longs to escape. Also, the scenes with Frannie were simply hilarious, all dog owners will be able to relate.

Recommendation:
A spectacular coming-of-age story with a relatable heroine, admirable relationships, and growth experiences for all the characters involved. A must-read! The book is available here if you wish to buy it.

Thoughts on the cover:
Fits perfectly with Harry's personality. I love how they included the Doc Martens.

Monday, October 6, 2014

Unbored Games: Serious Fun for Everyone - Joshua Glenn & Elizabeth Foy Larsen

Title: Unbored Games: Serious Fun for Everyone
Author: Joshua Glenn & Elizabeth Foy Larsen
Publisher: Bloomsbury, October 14, 2014 (Paperback) (Review copy is an ARC from the publisher)
Length: 175 pages
Genre: Young Adult/Children's Nonfiction
Started: October 6, 2014
Finished: October 6, 2014


Summary:
From the back of the book:

The best games book ever - for kids and the whole family, from the team that brought you the critically acclaimed award-winning bestselling UNBORED: The Essential Field Guide to Serious Fun. Featuring more than 70 games, from the traditional Highland Games and old-fashioned parlour contests to Google Earth challenges and the best game apps - plus ideas for hacking, customizing, and making up your own games, too!

Review:
I bought and reviewed the original book, Unbored, two years ago. It still has a coveted spot on my bookshelf because I've always loved books like Unbored and The Dangerous Book for Boys, what I call "compendium of information" books that have lovely bite-sized pieces of information about topics that are irresistible to kids.

Whereas Unbored looked at a greater variety of topics, Unbored Games looks specifically at games of all kinds: card, board, sports, apps, outdoor, collaborative, you name it. Normally I prefer a wider span of information in these types of books and narrowing it down to one area would bother me, but there is so much to cover on such a beloved topic that I actually applaud their focus. This is the kind of book you hand your kid on a rainy day or on Christmas vacation when they're starting to look like zombies from lack of stimulation. I have witnessed kids take up a whole day doing activities from books like this, so I know how effective they are.

What I particularly like about the Unbored books is that they're equally appealing to both genders. Boys and girls are equally featured in the illustrations participating in the activities, wearing pants and hoodies of the same unisex colour palette (red, green, blue, orange, grey). So much in our media is the very opposite of gender-balanced (as a parent and a teacher I'm very aware of this), so I really appreciate it when companies don't pull the whole "let's make twice as much by making one for boys and one for girls" thing.

I think even adults will enjoy this book, especially those who love games. I noticed a lot of oldies in here from my childhood, so there's definitely a nostalgia factor in here as well. They actually describe a version of a survival game I played in grade 5 when we were learning about food chains, plus lots of others I remember playing like Wink Murder and the jump rope variants. They also have the rules for Daifugo, which other anime geeks like myself might remember as Daihinmin, although when we played it in high school we called it a different name that I can't write here.

I have to give the authors credit for mentioning a lot of really incredible games. Board games like Settlers of Catan and Dutch Blitz, hand clapping games and card games, apps that kids can play with adults, outdoor games that kids can play at recess, and a really creative water gun game involving alka-seltzer tablets. They even talk about ARG and larping, and games that help benefit others.

Recommendation:
All parents, teachers, camp counsellors, anyone who interacts with kids needs a copy of this book. If you've ever been stuck wondering about entertainment options for a birthday party that don't cost a fortune, if you've had students bouncing off the walls during indoor recess, or if you have kids that seem to exhaust all other options on school vacations, this book is for you.

Thoughts on the cover:
I like the continuity from the first Unbored book, this time in yellow with silver lettering.

Saturday, October 4, 2014

Where Silence Gathers - Kelsey Sutton

Title: Where Silence Gathers
Author: Kelsey Sutton
Publisher: Flux Books, 2014 (Paperback)
Length: 350 pages
Genre: Young Adult; Fantasy
Started: September 29, 2014
Finished: October 4, 2014

Summary:
From the back of the book:

For as long as she can remember, Alexandrea Tate has been able to see personified Emotions, and she's found a friend in Revenge. He's her constant companion as she waits outside Nate Foster's house, clutching a gun. Every night since Nate's release from prison, Alex has tried to work up the courage to exact her own justice on him for the drunk driving accident that killed her family.

But there's one problem: Forgiveness. When he appears, Alex is faced with a choice - moving on or getting even. It's impossible to decide with Forgiveness whispering in one ear...and Revenge whispering in the other.

Review:
The premise of the book got me hooked from the moment I read the summary. This is actually a companion book to the author's first novel, Some Quiet Place. This instalment stands alone and simply uses the same premise as the first book.

Alex's is the sole survivor of a drunk driving accident that killed her mom, dad, and little brother when she was twelve. Since that day, she's been able to see Emotions in human form; beings that will appear beside or drape themselves over herself or others as they feel that particular emotion. Revenge has been her best friend for the past six years, and now that Alex is eighteen and the man who killed her family is out of prison, Alex has to choose between Revenge and the newly met Forgiveness.

The idea of personified emotions is a particularly brilliant one, which the author utilizes quite well in the book. The beings can only be seen by select people, Alex being one of them. They're ephemeral, appearing and disappearing suddenly almost like spirits, taking on different appearances depending on the emotion (Lust is portrayed as female, Revenge as male for example). Every time they appear it makes your spine tingle, they're described so well.

Alex is a hard character to like. She's prickly, and intentionally hurts those around her. In that sense she's realistic though; she's been through a lot and it's understandable that someone who has lost their whole family would act like that. So though she's hard to love and root for, at least she's realistically portrayed.

Recommendation:
A great read with a creative premise.

Thoughts on the cover:
I can kind of see why how this image relates to the story, but I can think of so many other images that would work better.